Meet “Tyre Extinguishers,” The Closest We’ll Get To A Real-Life Fight Club

The internet never seems to disappoint. Did you know there’s a website named ‘Tyre Extinguishers,’ tasked with puncturing SUVs? The site gives detailed instructions like how to spot an SUV and how to deflate a tire. Not just that, the creator of this website also has a page detailing why they’re doing this.

I found the website in a Ycombinator thread. The group is active in the U.K. and has carried out several instances of deflating SUV tires. According to the website, ‘Tyre Extinguisher’ wants to take the convenience out of SUVs so that people stop using them.

Much like David Fincher’s Fight Club, ‘Tyre Extinguishers’ claims to be a decentralized group that anyone can join. While Fight Club didn’t end well for the group’s founders, let’s see if this is any different.

Climate Activists

At least that’s what they like to call themselves. The website, though simple, is comprehensive about the clause. They’re detailing everything, including using secure email services to share their activity with local news outlets. The above leaflet is also available for download from the site, and members are asked to put it on the SUVs they puncture. Here’s an excerpt from their website:

We are people from all walks of life with one aim: To make it impossible to own a huge polluting 4×4 in the world’s urban areas. We are defending ourselves against climate change, air pollution and unsafe drivers.

Okay… I guess. Climate change is a massive reality staring right at us. And traditional petrol and diesel cars have practically fast-tracked it. However, as it turns out, ‘Tyre Extinguisher’s’ quarrel is not only with ‘gas guzzlers’ but with electric SUVs too. Turns out, if there’s an SUV of any type, ‘Tyre Extinguishers’ will find it and puncture it.

In their defense, their website cites an article from The Guardian detailing how SUVs are bad for the climate. Here’s what Oliver Milman’s 2020 report on SUVs has to say about the vehicles:

Combining the weight of an adult rhinoceros and the aerodynamics of a refrigerator, SUVs require more energy to move around than smaller cars and therefore emit more CO2, overshadowing the car industry’s climate gains from fuel efficiency improvements and the nascent electric vehicle market.

How SUVs conquered the world – at the expense of its climate, The Guardian

While that gives us a reason to look at SUVs a certain way, these guys are talking about deflating someone’s car! However bad an SUV is for the climate, there’s certainly a better way to deal with the situation.

Terrorists?

You’re an extremist if you hold an extreme opinion about something. You become a terrorist when you start hurting innocent people to assert your opinion. Maybe ‘Tyre Extinguishers’ points out that SUVs are bad for the world, but their method is absolutely stupid.

People buy SUVs because they’re well-priced, spacious, powerful, and make a value-for-money package for many. A family of 6 can pack their bags, sit comfortably, and have room for their dog in an SUV, not a sedan, and certainly not a hatchback.

So Tyre Extinguisher’s “defending ourselves” doesn’t seem that convincing either. Also, if you’re running around deflating people’s cars and someone is in the middle of an emergency, you could cause a life and death situation for that person. So think hard before you dive into this.

If this group wanted to help, it could help tell people about how their SUV impacts the world. If it is a group as big and as notorious as they claim, they could spread awareness about the issue. In their current state, this group is not only being stupid but resorting to borderline terrorism.

What do you think about this SUV-deflating group? Do let us know in the comments.